I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Look Back.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is universally recognized as an iconic tough guy. Yet, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also delivered several critically acclaimed comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its three-and-a-half decade milestone this winter.

The Story and The Famous Scene

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a tough police officer who masquerades as a kindergarten teacher to catch a killer. For much of the movie, the investigation plot serves as a basic structure for Schwarzenegger to film humorous moments with his young class. Without a doubt the standout features a child named Joseph, who spontaneously stands up and informs the former bodybuilder, “It's boys who have a penis, females have a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “Thanks for the tip.”

That iconic child was brought to life by former young actor Miko Hughes. His career encompassed a character arc on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the Olsen twins and the pivotal role of the youngster who comes back in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with multiple films listed on his IMDb. Additionally, he frequently attends the con circuit. Recently discussed his experiences from the production 35 years later.

Behind the Scenes

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I don't recall being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're flashes. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My family, especially my mother would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was a mass tryout. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there briefly, read a small part they wanted and then leave. My parents would help me learn the words and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was very kind. He was enjoyable. He was pleasant, which arguably isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a productive set. He was great to work with.

“It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a huge celebrity because my family informed me, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was merely entertaining and I just wanted to play with him when he was available. He was busy, obviously, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd tense up and we'd be holding on. He was exceptionally kind. He bought every kid in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was like an iPhone. This was the coolest device, that funky old yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It eventually broke. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's amusing, that movie became a phenomenon. It was a major production, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the other children would hand me their devices to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

That Famous Quote

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember the context? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word taboo meant, but I understood it was edgy and it caused the crew to chuckle. I knew it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given approval in this case because it was comedic.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it originated, according to family lore, was they were still developing characters. A few scenes were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they developed it during shooting and, reportedly the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I need time" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she felt it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.